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The Old Love Song is True... Breaking Up is Hard to Do!
There is nothing sadder than suffering a broken heart. Whether the two of you were dating for almost forever, or got together only recently, going through a break up hurts. Of course there are friends and family to comfort you; or, to be more accurate, trying to comfort you. Sure, they mean well when giving advice, "You can do better", "Someone nice will come along", but what you really need is a remedy for a broken heart, and not a bunch of empty sympathy.
Is it really possible to mend a broken heart? Of course the answer is yes. It is possible, but not always easy. Having the right attitude is vital as you work everything out. There may be times when you feel like giving up, but stick with it and you will come out feeling better than ever before. It's going to take an investment of time, but it can be done.
The first step is to take control of your feelings. Emotions always run high after a break up, so much so that it can cloud one's judgment. Kept unchecked, your feelings can get the better of you. Rationality takes a backseat to recklessness and you may find yourself doing things you would never do otherwise. Being aware that this is a possibility will help you to remain level headed. The other thing that will help control your emotions is the passage of time. The more time that has passed since the breakup, the more your heart will naturally mend.
If quite a bit of time has passed, but you still can't seem to cope, then you may need to seek the advice of a therapist, or a counselor. Sorry AMA, there's nothing a Doctor can do here, unless he's single and available and makes house calls. It's possible your broken heart has progressed into full-blown depression. Your friends and family may be telling you to "just get over it" or that you have a case of the blues, but depression is a serious medical condition. Maybe you're not depressed, but only a therapist or counselor will know for sure. Either way, you should remember that professional help is always a possible remedy for a broken heart.
It's easy to fall into a state of denial after a breakup, but the quicker you face reality, the sooner you will be able to get on with your life. Denial is nothing more than a dysfunctional coping mechanism. The problem is that your broken heart can't be mended when you're in denial. Facing the reality of the situation may not be easy, but it sure beats living in denial for the remainder of life.
What it all boils down to is this: Living with a broken heart isn't fun. There is no reason that you should suffer for the rest of your life. Even if you lost your lifelong soulmate, it's okay to feel good about yourself. Whether it was all your fault, all his fault, or nobody's fault, it happened to the both of you. One heart became split in two, and now both hearts must mend.
The passage of time, having the right attitude and doing whatever it takes is the only cure. Before you know it, you'll meet someone new and nice. That new some one will think you are a prize that must be won, and your head will swoon at the possibilities in store. Then, and only then, will you know you have found the remedy for a broken heart.
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